Tuesday, 16 November 2010

61. hunger

                                                                      sudden wave of nausea

Eat something.
                                                                      i'm gonna puke

Too much liquid. Your belly is so soft. It's making wierd squishy noises. Like a water mattress.
                                                                      i don't know what's inside me

Like putting a sea shell against your ear, I can hear the sea.
Though it's probably gas.
                                                                     it's all dead, rotten, rotting

We could have some fun.

                                                                    no, no, i don't want to go, please

I wouldn't hurt you.


I rather like you. I want to make you feel good.

                                                                         please, no



One touch.


One kiss.


One little kiss.

                                                                     no tongue

So sweet. Yum.

                                                                     you said...

Why can't you be more enthusiastic?

                                                                my mum keeps asking me


                                            i think she wants to kill me tear me apart make me happy

I want to make you happy.
Do you need to be dead to be happy?

                                                                   why ar you asking me these things i want to sleep

Want me to shoot you up?

                                                                  it makes me sick to my stomach

Give me your veins.

                                                                     mum's gonna kill me

I will keep your blood forever in this
little vial with your name on.

i carry a book with me always like a talisman
something to keep me safe from the world
my self
I love you. You're special.

                                                   i'm a stereotype and i want to go home and
                                                        i can't sleep i just stare dream
                                                                with my eyes open
                                    sometimes of someone who would love me so much
                                                               he'd tear me to pieces
                                                                and make me forget

This is my favorite switchblade.
Lick it.
I will make you forget.
I will remember you always.

1 comment:

  1. These words coil in my gut like a fecal slimy snake infection - chain linked, half remembered nightmares of blury psuedo relationships with poisoned peoples with noxious breath - my averted eyes and awkward instance - how did I get there and what was I looking for? Did I trawl the bars searching for nightmare dogs and bitches? Did I give off some retched pheromone that brought the carrion birds to roost in my bed - why would I beg 'em to stay when they made my stomach wretch - when they sickened me to the core, to the marrow of my soul - why did I like that? why did I want that? Love me (I hate you) I love you (I hate me). Your words dredge up feelings that stick like nicotine stains in my memory DogBoy - not pleasant ones, true - but their affect proves you can write, you can write.